Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
