i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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