So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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