Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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