Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
