Umm I'm too high to move.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
