fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
