we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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