508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Randomize
