He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
