Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
