3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
