i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
