I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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