3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
