My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
