She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
