the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
