he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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