Porn is love you can see.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
