I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
