Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We left an ass print on the piano.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
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