Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
