For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
The air taste purple.
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