One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Do you still have your period?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Couch. On fire.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize