p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize