THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
