Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
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