New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize