We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
