we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
