People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Randomize
