So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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