In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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