I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
