i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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