I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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