What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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