tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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