If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i think i have two assholes
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
