someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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