So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
