I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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