youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
