her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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