about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize