i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Randomize
