woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
His nipple licking is glorious
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