i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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