He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
sex in a hospital.. check
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
