I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
